To ''win'' a mentee spot at my company, I had to read a book, write goals, and fill out an application for the lottery. And I won! But the process didn't end there.
With my golden ticket in hand, I
traveled to London for a one-day mentoring seminar with speeches,
goal-rewriting, and more form-filling … before meeting my mentor
for one hour.
Does it have to be that complicated?
Yes ... if you think about a mentor as a
protege, master, teacher, or coach. Yes, if you take a glance at the long list of books on
the subject.
No ... if you think of being a mentor as a
… gift.
Like a gift, mentoring should be from
the heart, free of charge, and chosen with care. The most important
part is choosing with care, figuring out the wants and needs
of a mentee.
Most of us are terrible gift-givers. If
you're like me, you give gifts you want to receive yourself. It's human nature. It's
harder to get to know the person, and give them what they truly desire—and
even harder to give them what they really need.
And what mentees need more often than
not is the bigger picture.
The first thing my mentor did was to
throw out my goals. I was aghast!
Let's just talk, she said.
Well, I talked and she listened, for the most part. Mainly about
corporate culture and how to navigate it. She helped me see the
bigger picture, and in doing so, helped me reach my goals.
What a gift !
Under this model of mentoring, a mentor
need not be a manager or best in class, just be in a position to
give. It's that simple.
-------------------------------------
Rose Marie Burke is a mentor with the
Cherie Blair Foundation for Women and Vice President of Mentoring at
Paris Speech Masters. An editor and journalist, she writes a blog
about her personal insights into life in Paris. After 20 years in the
City of Light, she still calls her native Pittsburgh "home."
